by Mike Savage.
Thursday 29 April: The Mighty Saints v St Pierre.
Venue: The salubrious KGV.
A cold, dark and misty evening to kick off the new season. Brocky is strutting around like a big cock (of the feathered variety) having just pulled off a first for the A team in recent years. That being 12 A Team members fit and available for selection – RV graciously stepping aside. However methinks RV being a wise old soul saw the weather forecast !
We welcome new signings Lee ‘the fridge’ Gallienne, Dave ‘monkey’, ‘mini me’, ‘mini DJ’ etc etc Jones and Pete ‘nickname to follow’ Burroughs to the club. We also welcome back Goody and welcome Doddy and Brocky with a well deserved and overdue promotion to the A’s.
Scrappy calls heads – it’s a tail. Saints are invited to bat. DJ and the Ox first up. 12 on the board and not a legitimate ball bowled yet. The tempo is maintained through DJ’s delicate array of hoikes, pulls, nurdles and slaps. Ox watches on worrying that the new ball might hurt his new bat. The Ox departs for 9 – bat in tact. In comes Knosher. Looking pretty as usual but soon succumbs to the slowness of some rank bowling (18). No nickname Pete next. After facing the accurate bowling of Scrappy and Brocky in the nets, he struggles a touch with the box of liquorice (allsorts) being thrown down. But he is soon into his stride and stroking the ball around comfortably. DJ – 50 – well played that man. Out soon after for a brisk 55. Goody next. Goody puts on a show like only Goody can with a mix of sublime hits through the ‘V’, which no man wants to try and stop on a cold evening at KGV, and some mighty wielding of the bat with no connection.
I must mention the penultimate ball – I’m not sure I’ve seen a ball hit harder and was surprised the sightscreen was still intact. Goody out off the last ball missing it on his first pirouette, being caught LBW during the second. Goody 25. Pete no nickname yet not out on 13. Mighty Saints 148 for 4 off 16 overs. We’ll take that although 180 was looking good at one stage.
Saints take to the field. Doddy and the Fridge open up. That new ball eh ! It’s a bugger to hold and swings a mile. Well I gather that is the reason for the smattering of wides early doors. But despite this the required run rate is on the up straight away. The Fridge takes first scalp – pouched by Pete who by now should really have a nickname. Monkey, mini me etc is introduced to the action. Straight away there is a rubbing of the bald head whilst uttering the words ‘that’s just a hoike’ ! Monkey gets his man confident call and catch by DJ – personally thought Goody might have got there but think he was still feeling a little tender in the groin area after all that dancing earlier. Monkey is rubbing that bald head again ‘he just took that from outside off’. Personally thought Spenny should have covered more ground on the deep mid wicket boundary. Sandy out there Spen ?
Next ball Monkey strikes again. Bowls Kimber – the one guy in their ranks who could turn the game. The game then begins to dawdle. The odd boundary to keep the crowd interested and the odd two to the young Mr Tapp much to the frustration of Spenny (who was heard to utter that lad needs a good haircut). With all the bowlers keeping it fairly tight the rate is soon beyond 2 a ball. Spenny and Doddy both pick up well deserved wickets. Scrappy invites the Brockback to bowl the last but being a specialist fielder he has his spikes on. Scrappy takes the ball and despite a wicket bowls a fairly rank last over. St Pierre 109 for 6 after 16 Overs.
2 points to the mighty Saints ……………. next.


